Wednesday, December 7, 2011

How I Slept in My Bed Last Night

We have a 5-year old and 3-year old triplets. My wife was able to sneak away to the bed left behind by the kids.

The Exact Moment I Got the Flu This Year

About a month ago I was having some chest pains.  Enough so that it warranted a visit to the doctor.  I’ve had this pain once before this year.  It’s called pleurisy.  Some sort of infection in the chest wall that causes pain when there is friction between the chest wall and say your lungs.  So breathing or moving can cause this pain.  I know right?  Breathing, that’s kind of essential to living.  The first time the doctor gave me antibiotics and in a few days I was back to normal.  So, thinking this is the same thing, I had just been taking Advil for a couple of days and it was working but it wasn’t gone completely.  So there I was in the doctor’s office.  The doctor and I had determined it was the same thing as before.  I told her I was taking Advil and she said to keep going with that  until the pain subsides and I should be fine but call if it’s still around in a couple of days.  Cool.  Then it happened.

Doc:  “Do you want the flu shot?”
Me:   “Ummm no thanks, I usually don’t get it.”
Doc:  “Are you sure?”
Me in my head:  I just realized you must get paid for every flu shot you give, also you are a terrible salesperson…thank goodness you became a doctor.
Me: “Yup, I’ll maybe get it at work.  They have clinics set up for the next few weeks.”
Me in my head: Nope not getting it.

Two weeks later, fever, chills, phlegm and now coughing.  So a total of 3 weeks in and I’m still coughing.

That is all. Run along.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

5 things I Googled today

1. Can you warm/heat up mayonnaise?

2. Sepinwall Parenthood

3. TV Guide Listings

4. Shopbot

5. fuckyeahteambartowski

That is all. Run along.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

"Oh the redhead said you shred the cello. And I'm Jello baby"


I take back what I said about Rob Ford.  I knew it.  It’s like betting on the Bills.  You just don’t do it.  No matter how ‘in the bag’ you think it is.  The story is here.  Apparently Ford is all in on the joke then goes back inside and calls 9-1-1.  It seems Ford went on a rant with a bunch of expletives thrown in.  He’s declined to comment.  I sit corrected. 

Looking Forward

Friday is a big day.  End of the work week, beginning of the weekend.  I’ll have to preface this by saying that we have 4 small children.  A soon to be 5-year old and three, count ‘em three, yes triplets, the trifecta, the tre, the hat trick…, 3-year olds.  So, it’s not hard to believe that my wife and I don’t go out.  We go out here and there, she has drinks after work, I get to go to the gym a couple times a week (on a good week) to hang out with my buddies.  Friday my wonderful siblings and I are going to see Sheezer.  Yup an all-woman cover band of Weezer!  Oh baby, chips and gravy!

From the department of ‘all things seem to happen at once’, Friday is also the final season premiere of one of my favourite shows – Chuck.  I’m likely not going to be able to watch this as I’ll either be already downtown or putting the kids to sleep so I can go downtown.  No PVR either.  I’ll have to catch it online somewhere the next day.  Watch the teaser here.


Well, there’s the arena thing. The story from the Journal.  Looks like E-town is getting a face lift.

Tonight the Oil are up against the best team in hockey at the moment – the Caps.  Should be a good test.  We’ll find out if RNH stays or goes back to junior after this game.  I think he stays.  How could he not?  He leads the team in points.  Plus the game is on TSN so hopefully the Oil put up a good showing.  Checking the lines it might be a good idea to put some coin down for the Oilers to beat the Caps, now I just gotta find two other games to parlay. 

Text to my betting guru – “Oilers might be a good play tonight – just sayin’”
Text back – “I have some money on them…”


So I just decided to give back to the community.  Pledging some dough to the United Way that automatically gets deducted from my paycheque.  It’s out of the goodness of my heart…ok who are we kidding it’s like 60% goodness of my heart and 40% I really really want to win something like and iPad or Leaf hockey tickets (that I would promptly sell for way over market value to some obsessed Leaf fan).  I am a bad person.

Also just thought of some of the best charity slogans or at least the ones I like:

United Way – Without you there would be no way.
Canadian Blood Services – It’s in you to give.

That is all.  Run along.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Oh Apple, you had me at "Do you have an appointment?"

My wife and son like sleep.  You should see my wife try to wake up our 4 year old (soon to be 5, who, yes, sleeps in our bed).  They’re side by side and back to back, both half asleep, and my wife manages to barely utter the words “E wake up.” Sure, that’ll do it.  “Umm hello kettle it’s me J.”

My iPhone 4 home button hasn’t been working for a couple of weeks.  It’s intermittent.  I just realized that today might be the last day of my one year warranty.  I took it to Telus, the gentlemen pressed the button several times to confirm that, yes I am telling the truth.  Then he proceeded to direct me to go to the Apple store.  Have you been in here?  The Apple store is a little intimidating.  I realize I don’t really know where to stand.  No lines.  I think you just sidle.  Which is what I did.  Then a nice gentleman named Lucas helped me out.  He asked if I had an appointment.  An appointment? Am I at a doctor’s office?  You mean you can’t just help me out right now?  I have an appointment.

Also, for like 18-19 years I’ve been marking October 26 as the day my friend (now my wife) used a baseball game to cop a feel (well really a hug but it sounds way better my way).  We went down to the SkyDome a bunch of us highschoolers and watched the Jays win the World Series on the what was then one of the biggest screens in the world.  When Timlin threw over to ….  for the final out, she was the first one to snag a hug.  A couple of days ago, the 24th of October to be exact there were a bunch of “This Day in Sports” things and it turns out the Jays won their first World Series October 24th, 1992.  So for like 18-19 years I was totally wrong.  The Oilers still won 5 Stanleys right?

Seems like whenever I have money, the second I know it, I start figuring out how I can spend it.

CBC – this our has 22 minutes and Rob Ford.
I’m on the ‘I don’t really agree with Rob Ford’ side of things.  However, a story this morning about the CBC show This Hour Has 22 Minutes ambushing Ford in his driveway actually had me siding with Ford.  I’m all for jokes and sticking to a guy who seems to be sticking it to Toronto but when you have a father taking his 6-year old daughter to school – probably not the best timing.  Six year olds don’t know it’s a joke, they see strangers coming at them and their father.  Bad move CBC.

There’s nothing I hate more than being late.  I kind of over-react when this happens. 

I hope Edmonton gets it’s act together.

So back to the Apple Store, I was early for my appointment by 2min. see lateness above.  I had to check in, and they told me to have a seat at the Genius Bar.  I told them my problem with the home button.  The nice Genius took it to the back to open the phone up.  2 things – if it’s water damage – which it likely was (we have 4 children) then it does not fall under warranty, and B) I am one day out on my warranty coverage, it ended yesterday.  The Genius came back and started like this “Unfortunately….”  Great, I’m thinking there’s no way I’m getting this fixed.  I’m gonna have to live with this button and if it gets worse there’s nothing I can do.  The Genius goes on to say exactly the 2 things that I noted above but, and here’s the AHHHH light shining from above moment, “…we can make a one-time exception this time.  Usually it costs $169.00 to replace a phone out of warranty or with water damage but we will waive the fee and get you a new phone today.  You’ll just have to sync it when you get home but it’s totally usable right now.”

Me – “uh yeah, sure, that would be great if you could do that”
Me in my head – “This really is the Genius Bar…did I just steal something from Apple?...Are they following me home?”

And that’s how customer service is done.  Apple, I’m yours forever.

Monday, October 24, 2011

5 Things

1.  Do not cover your a/c unit.  Place a piece of plywood and a brick on the top.  Covering the whole unit  makes it a home for mice and it traps moisture and condensation in and that will eat away at the parts.

2.  Variable rate mortgages save more money in general than fixed rate mortgages.  Also, there is no penalty for switching to fixed from variable, at any time.

3.   Actual headline : 20 Leave Toronto Lingerie Football team in dispute over safety/coaching - the concerns are coaching and 'shoddy equipment'!  HAR!  Really ladies? Really?

4.   Ryan Smyth is awesome.

5.   Justin Beiber is approaching Celine Dion annoying status.  Evidence: the nerve to go to a Jets game with his gf and wear Jets jerseys - him #6, she #9.  Cringe.  Someone tweeted after - did Beiber ask Bobby Hull if she could wear that number?  C'mon man. *shaking head*

Wednesday, September 7, 2011


Just sitting here listening to a Beatles playlist and drinking scotch on the rocks.  Doing a little reminiscing about my father.  Here's a post from a blog I had once upon a time.  It's 30-year old me talking.  30-year old me who was expecting his first kid.  We're at 4 now.  It went like this:

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Happy Birthday Dad!

We're expecting our first child this November. The little guy is due just after my 31st birthday. I really can't believe it. Today is his grandpa's birthday. People always say you turn into your parents. I suppose they're right. In terms of looks, I'm a carbon copy of my father. Personality wise some traits are there but others my mother got to first. Just a weird feeling today knowing that I'm going to be a father. My dad is probably not thinking about us (the kids, 31, twenty-something - my sis, and 24) too much at all today. He is probably laughing it up with his brother (I plan to do the same thing throughout my life) and I'm sure he is feeling grandpa-ish with my Uncle and all of his grandkids - 4, and two more on the way. He's going to be a wonderful grandpa. He's done an amazing job with the three of us and will probably evoke some kind of revenge through my little guy but I'm sure that goes with the territory.

Happy Birthday Dad!